1. Jan says:

    I totally agree with this but I have given up on church because when I go it is too much hard work to make friends. People are superficially welcoming and friendly but it does nit go any deeper. Unless you are able to join a house group nobody is really interested in getting g to know you. I would love if someone e had invited me for a coffee or just to drop round rather than being invited to another meeting. I feel lonely and sad but I feel worse after going to church.
    Ps I did try for several weeks.

  2. Matt Hyam says:

    That is really sad…

    I am saddened that you see being invited to housegroup as being invited to “another meeting”, when it is meant to be being invited into deeper relationship and community. Sundays will never be able to provide this (as you have discpvered), which is precisely why we have always said that our church is built around housegroups, because it is only in smaller groups that we can genuinely have relationship with one another. It is meant to be a community where we can get to know one another properly and beyond that superficial level you talk about.

    I am really sorry that it has not worked for you, but I do genuinely think that what you crave is available to you, if you would try a group (you are welcome to ours). If not, then fair enough, I hope that you find what you are looking for.

  3. Andy Evans says:

    Thank you so much for your posts Matt which I have recently stumbled upon. I have found them really inspiring and encouraging, particularly at the start of a year that globally feels anything but positive.

    As a member of an Evangelical Church I have been struggling with many aspects of their doctrines based on the evangelical alliance statement of faith and have been considering whether I was hypocritical in maintaining my membership. But what you say in this post about the dangers of schism and individualism has convinced me to actually do the reverse and get more involved and try and help move it back to biblical roots and the teachings of Jesus.

    So thank you – keep challenging and keep writing

  4. Matt Hyam says:


    Thanks for letting me know that. It’s really encouraging.

    I remember hearing Brian Zahnd a year or so ago and over if the things he said really hit me. He said that there are seven types of church in the world (Catholic, Orthodox, Anabaptist, evangelical… Then I get a bit lost) but that each one has about the same amount of truth in it.

    There are many, many, many faults with evangelicalism, but there are also with the others.

    Bless you!

  5. Helen McQueen says:

    Found this helpful and thought provoking, Matt. Thank you.
    Helen (aka Steph’s mum)

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